Answer:
First, saying, “God your will be done” is a good place to get to. But if we start there by default, we might be missing some lessons and relational riches with God along the way. Secondly, we might miss out on the joy of asking and receiving and literally “changing God’s mind” (Jonah 3:10). Let me elaborate on those two ideas:
Sometimes it’s in the process of making requests and waiting on God that our hearts are formed most completely. In the asking/waiting process of prayer, we get pressed into more intimate relationship with God. So our desires shouldn't be submerged in that process as if our goal should be to limit ourselves to only one prayer: “your will be done.” Our desires are clues. Sometimes it’s true that our desires are too small or short sighted and God wants to get us something better. But how would we be able to recognize it, and learn from it, if we didn't earnestly pour out our hearts to God about what we REALLY wanted?
So it’s in the asking and by that I mean the persistent asking, that we wrestle with God as Father and come away knowing his care, and being transformed even when we didn't get what we asked for. CS Lewis once said, "I don't pray to change God, I pray to change me!" As we stay pressed into God, our very desires begin to morph. Without praying up those desires, we often don't even know what our true desires really are. So we have to start with real requests, and this LEADS to an attitude of "your will be done" in the disciple who is willing to wrestle with God like Jacob did.
It's OK to fight with God. I think he likes it! Look at the Psalms and how often David is quite literally pleading with God, fighting with him, questioning why his requests are unanswered... You see, it's the desires and the passion that keep him pressed in through unanswered prayer, and in the end, it’s that process that changes him into someone who trusts God always. Perhaps a person might just want to skip to the end and say, "well God's going to do what God's going to do", but that misses the transformation, relationship piece of prayer – in fact that person might even become embittered with a God whom they see as uninvolved, uncaring, passive. Prayer is not first about getting something, it's about a dialogue and a relationship.
Now having said that, let's not forget this other HUGE thing: sometimes, God is waiting to give us exactly what we ask for! James 4:2 says we have not because we ask not. I recently read again about Peter's miraculous escape from prison in Acts 11, as a response to believers who were in prayer for him. Now James the disciple had just been killed in prison the week before, so why didn't he get released miraculously? Before we say, “well God had a plan all worked out ahead of time and the prayers just matched what God already wanted to do” – let's ask what actually happened. God could just as easily have kept the Gospel movement alive without Peter as well as with Peter, right? He kept it going without James, didn’t he? He didn’t have to keep either James OR Peter alive. So how do we know God wasn't prepared for that scenario, but then, in response to prayer, he graciously acts? The text is clear that people are asking for Peter's release and Peter is then released. We can't say that the only reason that happens is because God willed it anyhow. That's not fair to the text. Moses pleads with God and God relents from a chosen plan (Ex 32:13,14).
The Bible makes it clear that God responds to prayer. Because even though God is sovereign, God is not a closed book who has the script or formula all worked out ahead of time. God is a Person who wants relationship with PEOPLE. There's give and take in any real relationship and it doesn't imply weakness in God if he responds to requests. He accommodates our free will inside of his working out of an eternal plan. Which means He's not ALWAYS changing our prayers and saying, 'no you dummies you don't even know what to ask for". It's true, we don't (Rom 8:26). But everywhere you read in Scripture, God is asking us to ASK (Matt 6:8; Phil 4:7,8). Why, unless he wants to respond? And time after time, we read that he does respond – sometimes, even giving us what we DON'T need! See Israel asking for a king.
See, prayer is God's monument to our own freedom of will.
Yes he has power and he has a plan... but the Bible paints the picture that God is ALSO at times, waiting on us, to see if we will act, and ask with passion and persistence. See the widow in Luke 18. The moral of that story is not to passively back off and just say, "your will be done." No! The moral of the story is pray and pray with passion and never give up! Yes, we may be frustrated if the answer is NO or the answer is WAIT. But keep on praying Scripture teaches, for something is going to break. Sometimes it will be us as we clarify our desires, our motives, our requests. And sometimes, God responds to our requests and we get what we ask for simply because we ASKED! Because God is NOT like the evil Judge, Jesus said, God is good and loves to give good gifts to his children.
Of course, we're all turned off by the people who treat God like a vending machine. Many of those people will turn from the faith, because God doesn't respond always when you put the quarters in. Yet we shouldn’t be shy about prayer because they might not be "smart" requests or always the best in light of God’s eternal plans, or perfectly aligned with his will. If your heart is that of a "thy will be done" disciple, (which is what praying in Jesus name means), then we pray our authentic heart and we trust our good God with the results: our request will be frustrated if it's off, it will be answered “yes” if it's on, it will be suspended if it's “not yet” or our motives are junked up... but for heaven's sake, never, never, never stop asking.
In prayer, God is waiting for me to discover what kind of power I have as his child; he’s wanting me to uncover my amazing privilege, to know it in my guts that I - yes I! - have an audience with the Almighty, that when I ask, his ear is attuned. To help me KNOW this, he will at times, give me exactly what I request, but not UNTIL I request it – to teach me that he is a Father and to always be pressed into him.
So when Luke records Jesus prayer instruction he includes this elaboration: “will the Father not give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him?” There is one request he ALWAYS honors, the greatest request we could ever ask for or receive: Himself. And it's upon the strength and wonder and gratitude for THAT best gift; that always-answered request, that we build our confidence in God's goodness. Which teaches us to ask and ask and ask... to let my requests be made known to God, to cast my anxieties on him because he cares for me... 1 Peter 5:7
